a broken promise ...

Just a couple for tonight. I'm super, super sick ...

"It felt like a broken promise. Like Fisher King's wound. It never heals."
-said by Shelby on Glee (Episode 1x19, Theatricality)

"You're still that sixteen year old boy to me. You always will be."
-said by Terri on Glee (Episode 1x20, Funk)

Mr. Schuester: "Rachel, you still seem mad about Jesse."
Rachel: "I want him to be eaten by a lion."
-from Glee (Episode 1x20, Funk)

i know when the stars are aligned you can bump into a person in the middle of the road, look into their eyes and you suddenly know

"I had a cold and I took all my antibiotics at the same time and now, I can't remember how to."
-said by Brittany on Glee (Episode 1x17, Bad Reputation)

"I'm gonna ask you to stop, because I'm starting to get embarrassed for you."
-said by Mercedes on Glee (Episode 1x18, Laryngitis)

Burt Hummel: "If things get serious, use protection."
Brittany: "Does he mean like a burglar alarm?"
-said by Brittany on Glee (Episode 1x18, Laryngitis)

I'm on the edge of glory
And I'm hanging on a moment of truth
I'm on the edge of glroy
And I'm hanging on a moment of you
-"Edge of Glory" by Lady Gaga

No words
My tears won't make any room for them, oh
And it don't hurt
Like anything I've ever felt before
This is no broken heart
No familiar scars
This territory's uncharted
... Follow if you want
I won't just hang around
Like you'll show me where to go
I'm already out of fool proof ideas
So don't ask me how to get started
It's all uncharted ...
I won't go as a passenger, no
Waiting for the road to be laid
Though I may be going down
I'll take in flame over burning out
-"Uncharted" by Sara Bareilles

I've been a lot of places all around the way
I've seen a lot of joy, and I've seen a lot of pain
But I don't wanna write a love song for the world
I just wanna write a song about a boy and a girl ...
I know when the stars are aligned you can
Bump into a person in the middle of the road
Look into their eyes and you suddenly know
-"Say Hey (I Love You)" by Michael Franti

"'But seriously, how do you get over the jitters?' Dad was still smiling but I could tell he had turned serious because he slowed his speech. 'You don't. You just work through it. You just hang in there.'"
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"I thought that getting to this part was the challenge. In books and movies, the stories always end when two people finally have their romantic kiss. The happily-ever-after part is just assumed."
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman


"She's running the show. Maybe she's just biding her tie. So you talk to her. You tell her to take all the time she needs, but to come on back. You're waiting for her."
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"Guys who'd never given me a second glance did a double take. And every time that happened, I felt a little bit more like the risky sexy chick I was pretending to be. Fake it till you make it actually worked."
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"Mom was so ferociously protective of people she loved, so much that she took insults upon them personally."

-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"I'd played that part of my life out It was time. I didn't even think twice about it ... Sometimes you make choice in life and sometimes the choices make you."

-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"I never expected to fall in love. I was never the kind of girl who had crushes on rock stars or fantasies about marrying Brad Pitt. I sort of vaguely knew that one day I'd have a boyfriend (in college, if Kim's prediction was anything to go by) and get married. I wasn't totally immune to the charms of the opposite sex, but I wasn't one of those romantic, swoony girls who had pink fluffy day day dreams about falling in love. Even as I was falling in love -- full throttle, intense, can't-erase-that-goofy-smile-love -- I didn't really register what was happening."

-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"It wasn't even a fight, really. We didn't shout. We barely even argued, but a snake of tension quietly slithered into our lives."
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"I hadn't really expected much to change. He'd still live nearby. We'd still see each other all the time. I'd miss our little powwows in the music wing, but I would also be relieved to have our relationship out from under the microscope of high school."
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"'I remember last year when Adam came over for Christmas Eve, I'd told your father that you'd fallen in love too soon.' 'I know, I know. What does a dumb kid know about love?' Mom stopped drying a skillet. 'That's not what I meant. The opposite, really. You and Adam never struck me as a 'high-school' relationship,' Mom said, making quote marks with her hands. ... 'You guys seemed, still seem, in love, truly, deeply.' She sighed. 'But seventeen is an inconvenient time to be in love.'"
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"Remembering Adam would be like losing him all over again, and I'm not sure I can bear that on top of everything else."
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"I have a feeling that once you live through something like this, you become a little bit invincible."
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

"Suddenly I just need to hold his hand more than I've ever needed anything in this world. Not just be held by it, but hold it back."
-from If I Stay by Gayle Forman

He slept a summer by my side
He filled my days with endless wonder
He took my childhood in his stride
But he was gone when autumn came
-"I Dreamed a Dream" from Les Miserables

i'm through accepting limits 'cause someone says they're so. somethings i cannot change, but 'til i try, i'll never know ...

More lyrics, more Glee ... :)

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game
Too late for second guessing,
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts,
Close my eyes and leap
It's time to try defying gravity
I think I'll try defying gravity
And you can't pull me down ...
I'm through accepting limits,
'Cause someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change,
But 'til I try I'll never know
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well if that's love it comes at much too high a cost
I'd sooner buy defying gravity,
Kiss me goodbye I'm defying gravity,
And you can't pull me down ...
So if you care to find me,
Look to the western sky,
As someone told me lately,
Everyone deserves a chance to fly
And if I'm flying solo,
At least I'm flying free,
To those who ground me
Take a message back from me
Tell them how I am defying gravity,
I'm flying high,
Defying gravity,
And soon I'll match them in renown
-"Defying Gravity" from the musical Wicked as sung by Elphaba (originated by Idina Menzel)

"He's cheating off of a girl who thinks the square root of four is rainbows."
-said by Kurt on Glee (Episode 1x10 - Ballad)

"Most of the time, I find it hard to be in the same room with you, especially this one, which looks like where Strawberry Shortcake and Holly Hobbie come to hook-up."
-said by Kurt on Glee (Episode 1x11 - Hairography)

"You look like a sad clown hooker."
-said by Finn on Glee (Episode 1x11 - Hairography)

"Ken has a lot of flaws. He has 74 flaws as of yesterday."
-said by Emma on Glee (Episode 1x12 - Mattress)

Keep on smiling,
'Cause when you're smiling,
The whole world smiles with you
-"When You're Smiling" by Frank Sinatra

Smile though your heart is aching
Smile even though it's breaking,
When there are clouds in the sky,
You'll get by
If you smile through your fear and smile
Smile and maybe tomorrow,
You'll see the sun come shining through for you
-"Smile" by Nat King Cole

"I want you to be happy, Finn. And when you care about someone, you can't sit around and watch them suffer when you know that you can do something about it."
-said by Rachel on Glee (Episode 1x13 - Sectionals)

"Being a part of something special makes you special."
-said by Rachel on Glee (Episode 1x01 - Pilot)

"I realized I had to find this new person inside of me, the one that was okay with what happened. ... That guy who made all those bad choices, who ignored the signs, he's gone. The new, more experienced, more interesting guy is here."
-said by Will on Glee (Episode 1x14 - Hell-O)

"My personality, though exciting and full of surprises, isn't exactly low-maintenance."
-said by Rachel on Glee (Episode 1x14 - Hell-O)

If you wake up and don't want to smile,
If it takes just a little while
Open your eyes and look at the day
You'll see things in a different way
Don't stop thinking about tomorrow,
Don't stop, it'll soon be here
It'll be better than before
Yesterday's gone, yesterday's gone
-"Don't Stop" by Fleetwood Mac

when two such people encounter each other and their eyes meet ... there is only that moment.

Finishing up the quotes from The Alchemist today, as well as several songs and some other Glee quotes. :) 

"'Maktub,' the merchant said, finally. 'What does that mean?' ... 'In your language, it would be something like 'It is written.'"
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo

"I don't know why these things have to be transmitted by word of mouth, he thought. I wasn't exactly that they were secrets; God revealed his secrets easily to all his creatures. He had only one explanation for this fact: things have to be transmitted this way because they were made up from the pure life, and this kind of life cannot be captured in pictures or words."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"The boy thought about his treasure. The closer her got to the realization of his dream, the more difficult things became. It seemed as if what the old king had called 'beginner's luck' were no longer functioning. In his pursuit of the the dream, he was being constantly subjected to tests of his persistence and courage. so he could not be hasty, nor impatient. If he pushed forward impulsively, he would fail to see the signs and omens left by God along his path. God placed the along my path. He had surprised himself with the thought. Until then, he had considered the omens to be things of this world. Like eating or sleeping, or like seeking love or finding a job. He had never thought of them in terms of a language used by God to indicate what he should do."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"He learned the most important part of the language that all the world spoke -- the language that everyone on earth was capable of understanding in their heart. It was love. Something older than humanity, more ancient than the desert. Something that exerted the same force whenever two pairs of eyes met, as theirs here at the well. She smiled, and that was certainly an omen -- the omen he had been awaiting, without even knowing he was, for all his life. ... It was the pure Language of the World. It required no explanation, just as the universe needs none as it travels through time. ... When you know that language, it's easy to understand that someone in the world awaits you, whether it's in the middle of the desert or in some great city. And when two such people encounter each other, and their eyes meet, the past and the future become unimportant. There is only that moment, and the incredibly certainty that everything under the sun has been written by one hand only. It is the hand that evokes love, and creates a twin soul for every person in the world. Without such love, one's dreams would have no meaning."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"'The day after we met,' Fatima said, 'you told me that you loved me. Then, you taught me something of the universal language and the Soul of the World. Because of that, I have become a part of you. ... I have been waiting for you here at this oasis for a long time. I have forgotten about my past, about my traditions, and the way in which men of the desert expect women to behave. Ever since I was a child, I have dreamed that the desert would bring me a wonderful present. Now, my present has arrived, and it's you. ... That's why I want you to continue toward your goal. If you have to wait until the war is over, then wait. But if you have to go before then, go on in pursuit of your dream. The dunes are changed by the wind, but the desert never changes. That's the way it will be with our love for each other. ... If I am really a part of your dream, you'll come back one day."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"When you are in love, things make even more sense, he thought."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"Whoever believe in dreams also knows how to interpret them."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"'Fatima is a woman of the desert,' said the alchemist. 'She knows that men have to go away in order to return. And she already has her treasure: it's you. Now she expects that you will find what it is you're looking for."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"If what one finds is made of pure matter, it will never spoil. And one can always come back. If what you found was only a moment of light, like the explosion of a star, you would find nothing on your return."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"'There is only one way to learn,' the alchemist answered. 'It's through action. Everything you need to know you have learne dthrough your journey. You need to learn only one thing more.'"
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"'My heart is a traitor,' the boy said to the alchemist, when they had paused to rest the horses. 'It doesn't want me to go on.' 'That makes sense,' the alchemist answered. 'Naturally it's afraid that, in pursuing your dream, you might lose everything you've won.' 'Well, then, why should I listen to my heart?' 'Because you will never again be able to keep it quiet. Even if you pretend not to have heard what it tells you, it will always be there inside of you, repeating to you what you're thinking about life and the world.' 'You mean I should listen, even it it's treasonous?' 'Treason is a blow that comes unexpectedly. If you know your heart well, it will never be able to do that to you. Because you'll know its dreams and wishes, and will know how to deal with them. You will never be able to escape from your heart. So it's better to listen to what it has to say. That way, you'll never have to fear an unanticipated blow."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 
 
"'Even thought I complain sometimes,' it said, 'it's because I'm the heart of a person, and people's hearts are that way. People are afraid to pursue their most important dreams, because they feel that they don't deserve them, or they they'll be unable to achieve them. We, their hearts, become fearful just thinking of loved ones who go away forever, or of moments that could have been good but weren't, or of treasures that might have been found but were forever hidden in the sands. Because when these things happen, we suffer terribly.' 'My heart is afraid that it will have to suffer,' the boy told the alchemist one night. 'Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search if its dreams, because every second of the search is a second's encounter with God and with eternity."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"When I have been truly searching for my treasure, I've discovered things along the way that I never would have seen had I not had the courage to try things that seemed impossible."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"What you still need to know is this: before a dream is realized, the Soul of the World tests everything that was learned along the way. It does this not because it is evil, but so that we can, in addition to realizing our dreams, master the lessons we've learned as we've moved toward that dream. That's the point at which most people give up. It's the point at which, as we say in the language of the desert, one 'dies of thirst just when the palm trees have appeared on horizon.' Every search begins with beginner's luck. And every search ends with the victor's being severely tested."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"When you possess great treasures within you, and try to tell otehrs of them, seldom are you believed."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"When you are loved, you can do anything in creation. When you are loved, there's no need at all to understand what's happening, because everything happens within you."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"Everything that happens once can never happen again. But everything that happens twice will surely happen a third time."
-from The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo 

"I want everything too much."
-said by Rachel Berry on Glee (Episode 1x08 - Mash Up)

"Life's a series of choices, a big combination of moments. Little ones that add up to big ones that create who you are."
-said by Will Schuester on Glee (Episode 1x08 - Mash Up)

"Leaders are supposed to see things that other guys don’t, right? Like they can imagine a future where things are better. Like Thomas Jefferson or that kid from the terminator movies, I see a future where it's cool to be in Glee club, where you can play football, ad where you can sing and dance and no one gets down on you for it. Where the more different you are the better."
-said by Finn Hudson on Glee (Episode 1x08 - Mash Up)

Hit me like a ray of sun
Burning through my darkest night
You're the only one that I want
Think I'm addicted to your light
-"Halo" by Beyonce

You're not alone
Together we stand
I'll be by your side, you know I'll take your hand
When it gets cold and it feels like the end
There's no place to go, you know I won't give in ...
So far away, I wish you were here
Before it's too late this could all disappear
Before the door's closed and it comes to an end
With you by my side, I will fight and defend
-"Keep Holding On" by Avril Lavigne

You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes, you just might find
You get what you need
-"You Can't Always Get What You Want" by The Rolling Stones

Where it began, I can't begin to know when
But then I know it's growing strong
Was in the spring, and spring became summer
Who'd have believed you'd come along?
-"Sweet Caroline" by Neil Diamond

Your smile just captured me, and you were in my future as far as I could see
And I don't know how it happened, but it happened still ...
Well, you had me from hello,
I felt love start to grow,
The moment that I looked into your eyes, I knew it
It was over from the start
You completely stole my heart
And now you won't let go
I never even had a chance you know,
You had me from hello
-"You Had Me From Hello" by Kenny Chesney

I've been telling my dreams to the scarecrow
About the places that I would like to see
I said "Friend, do you think I'll ever get there?"
Oh, but he just stands there smiling back at me
So I confessed my sins to the preacher,
About the love I've been praying to find
"Is there a brown-eyed boy in my future?"
He said, "Girl, you've got nothing but time."
But how do you wait for heaven?
And who has that much time?
And how do you keep your feet on the ground,
When you know you were born to fly?
My daddy he is grounded like the oak tree,
My momma she is steady as the sun,
Oh you know I love my folks,
But I'm keep staring down the road,
Just looking for my one chance to run
'Cause I will soar away like the blackbird
I will blow in the wind like a seed
I will plant my heart in the garden of my dreams
And I will grow up where I wander, wild and free
-"Born to Fly" by Sara Evans

i don't know if i'll make it, but watch how good i'll fake it

A few new ones for tonight ...

"If you can sing and dance in front of people, everything else is easy."
-from Glee (Episode 1x04 - Preggers)

"It's not easy to break out of your comfort zone. People will tear you down, tell you you shouldn't have bothered in the first place. But let me tell you something: There's not much of a difference between a stadium full of cheering fans and an angry crowd screaming abuse at you. They're both just making a lot of noise. How you take it is up to you. Convince yourself they're cheering for you. You do that, and someday, they will."
-from Glee (Episode 1x04 - Preggers)

All the odds are in my favor
Something's bound to begin
It's got to happen, happen sometime
Maybe this time I'll win
-"Maybe This Time" from Cabaret

"Your lack of imagination astounds me! This is only the beginning. If you can master this, you can sneak anything out of a store between your knees. Shoes, prom dresses -- I once got a cake out of a kid's birthday party with the candles still lit."
-from Glee (Episode 1x05 - The Rhodes Not Taken)

Emma: "Kurt, I'm a girl who knows her solvents and your breath smells like rubbing alcohol."
Kurt: "Oh, Bambi. I cried so hard when those hunters shot your mommy."
-from Glee (Episode 1x05 - The Rhodes Not Taken)

"I hope you have fun playing house with Quinn while you languish in your little ensemble. But my dreams are bigger than that and bigger than you."
-from Glee (Episode 1x05 - The Rhodes Not Taken)

It's hard to fight these feelings when it's so hard to breathe
Caught up in this moment,
Caught up in your smile ...
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
-"Just a Kiss" by Lady Antebellum

I don't know if I'll make it, but watch how good I'll fake it
-"Tonight, Tonight" by Hot Chelle Rae

"But everybody deserves their moment in the spotlight, you know, to shine? Oh, I got that standing ovation, Will. And it felt amazing. Like every bad decision I'd ever made just went away. I was back in the game."
-from Glee (Episode 1x05 - The Rhodes Not Taken)

on the loose to live my life, the way I think my life should be ...

As you'll be able to tell from this entry, I'm in a camp kind of mood. For those of you who don't know, I spent my summers growing up at a couple camps, one still standing, but not in use, and one that was sold off to a developer to parceled off the land but has mostly been unable to sell it. I've been there once, but I kind of want to go by myself to just think ... try to find areas I recognize, without the cabins or pavilions that used to be there. I haven't been in awhile, and it's definitely coming up on time for me to go. Every time I smell a bonfire, I think of it. The first reasonably cool weekday I can find to go hike, I will.

I've also gotten into Glee recently, so that'll be evident here, too.

"You think this is hard? Try being waterboarded. That's hard!"
-Sue Sylvester from Glee (Episode 1x01 - Pilot)

"The only life worth living is the one you're really passionate about."
-Emma Pillsbury from Glee (Episode 1x01 - Pilot)

For you, there'll be no crying
For you, the sun will be shining
'Cause I feel that when I'm with you
It's alright, I know it's right
And the songbirds keep singing
Like they know the score
And I love you, I love you, I love you
Like never before
-"Songbirds" by Eva Cassidy

The flicker of the campfire, the wind in the pines
The moon in the heavens, the stars that shine
A place where people gather to make friends of all kinds
A place where all our troubles are always left behind
So give me the light of the campfire, warm and bright
Give me some friends to sing with, I'll be here all night
If love is for those who find it, I've found mine right here
Just you and me and the campfire, and the songs we love to hear
-"Flicker" (a camp song)

Did you ever watch the sunrise turn the sky completely red?
Have you slept beneath the moon and stars, a pine bough for your bed?
Did you sit and talk with friends, though a word was never said?
Then you're just like me, and you've been on the loose
On the loose to climb a mountain
On the loose where I am free
On the loose to live my life, the way I think my life should be
For I've only got a moment and the whole world left to see
I'll be looking for tomorrow on the loose
There's a trail that I'll be hiking just to see where it might go
Many places yet to visit
Many people yet to know,
For in following my dreams,
I will learn and I will grow
For a trail that's waiting out there on the loose
-"On the Loose" (a camp song)

Please won't you catch a shooting star for me
And take it with you on your way
Though it seems that we just met, you're the one I won't forget
Hope some kind wind blows you back my way
And I was thinking maybe somewhere later down the road
After all our stories have been told
I'll sit and think of you
The dear friend I once knew
Shot through my life like a shooting star
-"Shooting Star" (a camp song)